maternal – Every Day Simple

Maternal Lit.

August 19, 2008 No Comments

Obviously writing is one of those things I just do, but this craft/trade/hobby/talent is not mine alone. For those of you who share my passion or maybe are just venturing into the realm, I thought on this craf-t day I would provide some links to some literary mags specifically designed and provided for moms like us.

Mom Writer’s Literary Magazine (not a terribly original name, but self-explanatory!)

Literary Mama — I subscribe to their e-zine and have for years now

HipMama

Brain, Child — They’ve redesigned their site since last I went there. Probably a great zine for my fellow brilliant mamas

TheMomCrowd posted about literary magazines, too. I thought the site was nice, so take a visit to see her comments about a couple of other sites I’ve not listed here.

Now, to actually submit some work to them.

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Pick me! I took a bold step and have my site up for nominations under Best Parenting and Hottest Mommy Blogger for a Blogger’s Choice award. The more votes I have, the closer my site is to page 1, and the more likely I am to reach other women who might have something to share. Pass along my site to your friends, and we’ll see what happens!

Life Lessons, Parenting

Domestic Goddess or CEO?

August 11, 2008 No Comments

A little more matriarchy is what the world needs, and I know it.
— Dorothy Thompson

My dearest husband, upon feeling better (from pneumonia this winter) and getting back in his groove, stated that he wanted a “flow” to the house. He wanted a system. My bursts of energy come and go with the moon, understandably, and I, too, get the feeling that we’re going to have to take an active role in channeling the energy in and around our home and affairs. Great. We have a heading. We know what we want, but how to get there?

I’m sure we’re not the only ones who want to save money but not sacrifice quality. We want to eat well but not blow the budget. We want to practice right livelihood, but we want to get out of debt. We want to trust the Universe to provide, and we want to know what’s going to happen when, where and now. Like nearly everyone else I know, we want it all. Pass the cake.

As the maternal head of household, largely in charge of maintaining course, what I want to know is: do I follow the stars, trust my instincts and ride the waves, or do I chart the course, follow advice and charge ahead? Am I a goddess or a chief officer? Is my home my dominion or my business?

I believe the delightfully frustrating answer is yes. Both. I am living the new age now, and I have made my life my business. The truth that pains us is that we want to draw these definitive lines, build these boxes around what we claim to understand. Do we really want to set ourselves up for disappointment? I admit, I want to get it right. I want to do what’s best for me, for my family. I want the “rules” so as to make it easy, clear-cut and simple to follow. I want to succeed. However, I’ve got to put my over-achiever ego in the backseat and let the goddess take the helm. Everything these days points to going with the flow. I’ll know when it’s time to chart a plan of action.

Maybe I should call myself a CDEG (chief domestic executive goddess). If my kids start singing their ABC’s, at least I’ll know they’re learning something, and maybe it will point out for me the absurdity of titles anyway. In the end, I’ll still be a MOM, no matter which course we take or what the ledger says.

We’re still sailing now. Let the wind blow.

Parenting, Relationships

mes raisons d’être

May 9, 2008 No Comments

This Friday post before Mother’s Day, I’m inclined to reflect on my
existence as a mother.

The commercial realm has
capitalized on the holiday. Beautiful flowers, cakes, chocolates,
clothes, jewelry, etc., etc., are everywhere, and I must admit, I’ve
thought twice about buying something impractical and not healthy.

But Mother’s Day originally came to be out of mothers’ love for their
children gone to war. It came from a cry for peace so that their
children wouldn’t have to be off fighting battles that were too great
for them alone and which pulled them away from their families. I’m sure
there are many now that cry for peace for such reasons.

I am blessed to have my family close, and my family extends beyond my
husband and children. We are fortunate to have a strong extended family. My aunts,
grandmothers, cousins, sisters-in-law, and friends are part of my
family, too. For them all, I am grateful. In this respect I feel very
young as a mother, feel very much my role as daughter. My grandmothers.
mothers and older friends embody a wisdom and beauty that only come
with age, time and experience.

As a mother myself, though, I can see how far I’ve come in my nine
years of this role. With each passing day, I learn something more —
mainly from my kids. Most days, I’m also given the opportunity to share
something with other mothers, and may this be my mother’s day gift to
you.

You are never alone.

All those before you and all those to come are with you, even during
your bad days, time-outs and moments when you wonder what you were thinking to have children.

All the flowers in the world and the shiniest jewelry will never match
the twinkle in your child’s eyes when they smile at you, their beautiful
mother,

Nor will they ever match the tearful, joyful pride in your own
mother’s eyes as she watches you and sees the mother you’ve become.

Rest on this your day.

Reflect on who you are at this point in your life,

And love deeply those you help make you the mother you are and the mother you are yet to be.

May you carry with you the blessings of the Mother, now and always.

Relationships

Maternal Connection

March 5, 2008 No Comments

None of us can deny the fact that we come from a mother, at least a mother’s egg. Some broaden their family by magnitudes and claim a mother country, while others open even more to say we’re all children of God (some even claim God as Mother).

Personally, I enjoy my relationship with my mom, though we don’t get to see each other often enough. What’s more, I love learning about her history since it plays such a role in who I am, issues I have to work through — good and bad. I love hearing about her mother and grandmother. These women, too, are part of my being.

While I’d love to know more about my family history, I don’t have the time for genealogy. What I do have are relatives from whom I can learn. I loved my grandfathers’ stories that all shared a thread of hard work, simple pleasures, risky adventures and wise advice. My grandmothers’ stories continue to relay a life of experience, how to make the best of what you have, caring for one’s self yet bestowing upon many others unconditional love. I listen with fascination and wonder if I will have grandchildren someday attentively listening to my stories. Will I have obstacles overcome with determination and skill? Will I have adventure? What lessons will I have to pass on if they are wise enough to ask and to learn through me? Only time will tell.

We all have mothers to learn from, even if they’re not biological. Maternal figures in our lives come in more ways than one. We have much to learn from them even as we go our own ways, and then another generation awaits, looking to us.

When I stand in my utility room, I see not a curtain in the window but my great-aunt’s apron. For some reason, it gives me strength and comfort the way the sun shines through the thin fabric made even more thread-bare from years of use. My daughter knows it’s an apron, too. Perhaps someday she will feel its strength and comfort, but probably not until she’s learned many stories and consciously tapped into the great maternal connection.