How many comic strips have been done about the many roles a mother performs? “Mother” at once also implies nurse, baby-sitter, chef, server, chauffer, social planner, chief home officer and sometimes even parole officer — to name a few. If compensated for our time and duties, our pay would exceed $100k in our current era. So why do so many of us want more?
It could be societal recognition. We want a title, aside from mother, that is recognized and monetarily compensated. That would be nice. Yet I know for me it is something more. I love being a mother and feel it is a worthy calling in and of itself. I will always be a mother. Yet I feel I have another role to fill in this life; I have something else to offer for the universal good. I know that being a mother is part of my role and will enhance whatever it is that I do. I’m sure few mothers can say that motherhood has left them unchanged as a person (major understatement, I know!).
So even after having four children, I wonder which path I am to follow. I would like to go to my spiritual director and ask, “What am I to do?” Actually, I already did. She’s told me I’m doing the right things as I begin my process of discernment. That’s at once frustrating and encouraging. It’s frustrating because like everyone else, I would rather know sooner than later what my life holds. It’s encouraging, though, because at least I know I’m on the right path.
What is it that I’m doing right?
- I write (almost) daily in my morning journal. In it I vent, ask for guidance, express my thoughts and sometimes experience little awakenings.
- I give myself space to listen and to talk safely and openly. In this space, I hope to hear my heart reveal my calling.
- I also have the luxury of a companion whom I have journeyed with for several years along our creative paths. Personal check-ins reveal how you’re treating yourself, what your dreams are telling you and where you are right now.
Basically, as I seek to find what role I will fill in addition to motherhood, I give myself space and time, which we know is a gift itself. The answers will come quietly in their own time. May I listen well and love deeply in the meantime.